so
i have all these fetishes
socks
humiliation
bondage
super strict straitjacket bondage
being treated as a pet
being treated as a toilet
being treated as an animal
and then eaten
what if these are just an aspect of the craziness in my brain? what if they aren't real, but just something my brain dreamed up to make it feel complete, and now the celexa is breaking them down into normal things?
anyone?
how does anyone know what's real?
Well to make it short, everything we feel and perceive is chemical stuff in the brain and that's whats "real" to us. Real is somewhat relative and not absolute, especially when talking feelings and thoughts. If you feel you have those fetishes they are real if you lose them, by therapy, medications or just suddenly realize they don't turn you on any more, they are not real, anymore.Don't really understand what you ment by "and now the celexa is breaking them down into normal things?"
ReplyDeleteI'd have to agree with dIRTBAG72.
ReplyDeleteWhat is real is what we perceive to be real. The philosophical 'brain in a jar' argument.
( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brain_in_a_vat )
So in effect, it can be argued that no one can truly _know_ what is real, but you can only act on what your senses and emotions tell you is real.
And in my opinion, that is usually real enough.
If the celexa makes you feel better, or at lest not as depressed, but also gets rid of your desire for some, or all, of your fetishes. Then you may be correct in your assumption that the depression and fetishes are somehow connected.
With or without your fetishes, I hope you are doing better, and better able to cope with everyday life.
Keep us informed.
i guess i don't buy that? like...um...
ReplyDeletei'm me, right? i'm not you, or anyone else. what makes me me? it has to be the fact that i know what i am, and recognize my own thoughts. so, if my own thoughts aren't really me, and just caused by my depression, than my me-ness isn't real, right?
so, then, i'm not me. i'm some other me, just in the same body.
and ok, yeah, i've had a bit to drink tonight. i'm getting /better/, not /perfect/. :-P
and the celexa helps like a lot. however, i'm starting to think that it's not so much the celexa as the change in celexa that helps. when i've changed doses, that week or two have helped tremendously. after that, i kind of drift back down to a state of 'not so bad.' not so bad is better than suicidal, but not nearly as good as 'don't want to die.'
in any case, i'm getting pretty sure that my fetishes are sticking with me, as i do seem to get turned on my the same stuff i always did. i guess i just don't share as much as i used to.
Well it a philosophical argument that cant really be answered, or proven. But no matter what train of thought one adheres to, your point is the crux of it.
ReplyDelete"i'm me, right? i'm not you, or anyone else."
What makes you who you are is your thoughts, desires, and experiences. So regardless of how you received them or perceived them, they are part of you. And I suppose that's as real as it gets.
Typically an increase dose of medication has a better effect which fades as you become used to it. But hopefully it will help you deal with your feelings and keep them from overwhelming you.
As far as the fetishes are concerned. The important thing is to be happy and comfortable with who you are. I believe everyone has their own personal fetishes, so who am I (or anyone else) to judge what pleases someone else.
Anyway - hope you feel better, have a pleasant weekend, and enjoy yourself in whatever way you find to be the best for you.
- TTFN