why i like this stuff: mummification

i've always liked the idea of mummies, both from like historical stuff, and movies and things like that.  it always kind of felt like it'd be a fun thing, to be wrapped up super tight and unable to move any.  this kind of extends to sleep sack things too, as it's just a different way of getting to the end state: stuck in a smooth form with your legs together and arms tight to your body.

however, just recently, my best friend had a baby, and one of the things you do to babies to keep them quiet and calm is to swaddle them, by tightly wrapping them in a blanket or something.  this keeps their arms tight to their body, and they feel safe and comfortable, so they stay quiet.

i'm thinking that this might just be the same mental stuff.  maybe some people grow out of the swaddling phase, and others like me don't.  i just have the same idea that being mummified kind of has a safe and calming feeling associated with it.

any thoughts?

totally pandering

but i really wish i could get someone to eat me out right now.  stupid drugs making me have crap libido and sex response.  :(

sorry everyone, just had to vent a bit, and this is where i do it.

:(

dear my doctor,

sorry, but these antipsychotics aren't really having the "ton of bricks" response you promised.  i'm still awake, and wishing i could snuggle up with sleep for a fun night of not having nightmares.  maybe i should take more?

love
sammy

still lazy

last post, read it again, it's the same thing here.

i did discover that i'm clinically sucky at sleeping.  maybe that's part of my problem?

anyway, i do seriously mean to post more, i just have trouble with the motivation.  i hope that gets better soon.

sorry everyone!

lazy

i know i said i'd post more once my brain got sorted out, and now my brain's sorted out, and i'm still not posting.

sorry.

mostly it's due to laziness, and the problem with sorting through pictures without getting so turned on that i get distracted.  since i have like months of things i've saved stored up, that's kind of hard.  my main criterion is: no commercial photos from some webpage (because i don't want to get in trouble); nothing that will get my blog taken down again (because that was scary, and i don't want google mad at me); nothing that is super easy to find for someone else (so, not like deviant art and stuff like that that i can just link to).  since pixiv requires a bit of japanese reading to get to, i'm not so averse to posting that stuff, but i do kind of feel bad (since it's just like japan deviant art, you know?).

but my brain is still doing ok, and even though i'm fighting with sleep (and need to apparently go sleep for doctors for them to tell me that yes, i suck at sleeping), i'm still mostly ok.  i kind of want to go kiss (at least) the guy who made zoloft, because the way i felt before compared to the way i feel now is like night and day.

although it turns out two pills a day makes me want to kill myself.  so, maybe he just gets a peck on the cheek.

anyway, still here, still (mostly) sane, still intending on getting stuff going again, but just lazy.


thanks, everybody!