well. huh. shit.

so i had a doctor appointment today.

and like always, the doctor was all, "let's steal your blood for funsies!"

and medicine.  whatever.  doctors are bad vampires.

and then she called me up.  "so, your labs are back.  did you know you have shitty liver function?"

"no?"

"so...if you drink, maybe don't drink for three weeks, and we'll check it again?"

"yeah...sure...no drinking.  sure.  ok."


to be honest, my life is basically a never ending cycle of "wake up because your phone told you to stop sleeping", "go to work and struggle against a non-stop avalanche of horrible tasks", "go home, and try to not starve yourself to death, you fucking fattie," and then "drink yourself to sleep while you watch stupid youtube videos."

i slot in "read the porn to masturbate to, and write porn for other people to masturbate to" when i can.

so.

this sucks.

i'm trying to think of things to drink while i watch youtube videos, because i don't think i can just not drink and watch youtube videos.  tea?  is that a thing?  does anyone think that would work?


"oh, sammy! i didn't know your brain was still fucked up and you were still drinking a lot to cover up a lot of anxiety that doesn't often surface when you hide behind double locked doors!"

we all knew.  don't pretend, ok?