haha! i'm garbage!

first up: wow.  good job, me, not pulling out edit notes when you told me you were going to do that!  great, that one person has been like, "uh, sammy, probably a mistake?"

so, hey:

all you

want to edit?  mostly it's "that's not a word, sammy" and "who is this 'captain jerkbutt' character?" and "jfc, is this supposed to have text, or am i just supposed to accept [this comment in square brackets] junk."  this is a serious request for people who can read and note obvious errors quickly.

i can do this too, but i take drugs now, and although they make it so i can re-read things, they also make it super frustrating to wait for a calm me to arrive and reread.

so, hey, anyone interested?

second: whoops, i guess i need to add porn to chapter 3, because my outline just fucked up and put in a bunch of socialist organizing.

this isn't an editable thing, just a warning that it's going to be way left-er than you might expect.

conform or fuck off.  i seriously don't give a fuck which you do.

third: this might end up being less sexy.  when i follow the intentions and drives out, they don't end up quite as sexy as i would like.

i mean, there's lots of predictive "whoa!  this is going to get super HHHOOOTTT!!!"

but, maybe not?

is that a problem?  if i bill myself as a pornographer, but instead deliver manifestos, does that detract from my pornography?

or do i just allow that people who can't accept egalitarian porn are really just assholes?

super early on this, but

i may be moving.  to someplace else.  maybe.  with a different job.  possibly.

so that might make me even worse about posting.  or writing.  or all of this, really.  since.  "new job."

potentially.

just wanted to say something about it, because i'm kind of freaking out a bit at the idea.

and, because i'm wonderful, i outlined a new story i won't write for three years, because i'm awful at completing things.

allegedly.

i don't even know

It could only be death incarnate.

She looked at the thing, as her groceries clattered to the ground.  It turned to face her, and all she could do was run.  She dashed to the door, fumbling for her keys.  They slipped from her fingers, jangling as they hit the concrete.  She spun around, watching it approach slowly.

It didn't walk right, her mind tried to make sense of it's slow deliberate steps, picking each foot up higher than necessary, almost a strut.  It towered above her, casting spindly shadows of appendages.  Then it spoke.

"You are frightened," the voices said calmly.  There were dozens of individual tones, some male, some female.  "I.  I have frightened you."  It seemed confused by this.

She curled up into a ball, wishing the thing would kill her quickly, and not drag it out.  She found herself in it's shadow as it stood above her.  There were soft feather like touches on her body as it seemed to be inspecting her.  "I did not intend this," the voices whispered.  "I only desired to see things."

She squeezed as tight as possible and sobbed.  After nearly a minute, she opened her eyes to find herself alone, with her groceries sitting in the grass.

so. remember how i'm still going crazy, but no one i see in real life notices anything?

guess who's getting a promotion at work?

like "we really appreciate everything you've been doing, sammy, so i'm trying to push through a good raise, and you'll have to do all the paperwork and stuff, but since i'm the one who makes the decision, i think you've got a pretty good chance."

so this is the point where i think i just shrug my shoulders, and accept that the entire world is fucking crazy, and i'm just one of the few people who can see the kuroko shuffling shit around.

i don't know.  yesterday i was planning on if i could just eat fried chicken until that killed me.  maybe i should eat a salad tomorrow?